Here I Go Again On My Own

I feel that I should give this place another semester. Maybe once I move away and am on my own things will begin to look up.  Moving away will eliminate lots of things and then I will be able to clean my slate of lots of little things that have been building up inside me for years. I will be able to write my dad and tell him how I really feel.

So far I have been told that my teachers that I will have next semester are good and nice to their students. I talked to my advisor and she told me that I was just handed lots of bad luck this past semester along side lots of  insanely tough picky teachers.

I asked my teacher if there was another teacher that teaches the art class I did no good at and she said that it is all a matter of luck. It really frightens me that I might have to deal with this teacher again.

My advisor tells me that you did not mean to insult me and that I need to figure out how to separate how you make me feel and my studies but I find that impossible when you treat me the way you do.

How am I suppose to feel when I am the only one that needs to keep doing things over and over and over again. Smart? I don't think so! When your name is called out in front of your whole class from day one to past the end of the semester and your teacher announces "Jessica (Mindy) I need to talk to you privately just to tell you that you need to redo this thing AGAIN". No one elses name is being called out as much as mine.

How do you think I feel when it is the end of the semester and I still am redoing things that were from unit 1. Or even if everyone is on the next unit closing in on the end and I still cant get unit 1 and now I am behind in everything else.

A part of me knows that there is probably no other school in Wisconsin that will have a learning system that will be good for me. But nothing is clicking with me.  I know college is going to be difficult no matter what I major in or where I go but something doesn't feel right. Is my problem just that I am getting bored with my school very quickly.  I am sure people at UWM do not have this problem.

The majority of me wishes there was a school that had Alverno's educating system only with a little more guidance with an environment and community like UW Madison. I would never get bored and have the help I need plus more. I do not want my teachers to hold my hand but they do not do enough as it is to help me understand stuff.

Is art therapy what I want to do?  I do enjoy making art and helping people but is this what is best for me. I do not know. Is it just the school or is it me?